|Ok, this is one I remember from the three week stay back in May/June.
I remembered it totally the night of the power outage. I was writing it in my journal. I
thought I would share this one, and the others as I remember them.
I call this one, "Crossroads". Read it. You will understand.
So there I am, in the main lobby, and it seemed like twilight. I was eating my popcorn and watching people. As it got darker, I noticed the walls shifting and changing. The people that were coming and going to work were fading out and being replaced with other people that were standing around.
After everything became solid, I was in a new area I recognized, but I didn't. It was a "y" shaped room. The ends of the "y" were exits, and in the center were lots of monitors like you would see at an airport. The people were milling around and watching the names appear and disappear on the monitors. The place was LARGE.
There were all types of people. From every walk of life, career, you name it. ALL of humanity was represented.
I started walking around, trying to get people to talk to me. I kept asking, where am I, what is this place, but no one would answer me. I looked at the monitors, I half expected to see flight arrivals and departures, but they had names listed, and next to the name, was one of three symbols. Each symbol was one of the three exits.
I kept trying to get someone to talk to me. Finally I got really frustrated and decided to go check out the exits. The first one, as I walked up the hall to it, I got the hebbie gebbies really bad, I mean a cold chill and fear like you wouldn't believe.
There were some people that were walking to that exit, like cattle to slaughter, as if they knew where they were going and had known what was going to happen and they couldn't do anything about it. There were others that cried and screamed. I decided to get back to the center area fast.
There was an area where some people were sitting, and I wandered over and sat down trying to get my wits back. I figured I'd go roam some more after I calmed down. Then all of a sudden the woman I was sitting next to spoke to me. "You're not suppose to be here". I asked her, "Where is here?", she replied, "You're not suppose to be here." I say, "I don't even know where here is!! One minute I am at the Cleveland Clinic, eating popcorn and drinking pop, and next I am here, and this place isn't Kansas, or Emerald City."
"You're not suppose to be here, you're not suppose to be here." she says, I say, "Where is here? Where am I? Who are you? Are you suppose to be here? How did I get here?"
She says, "You're not suppose to be here." I gave up and decided to check another one of the exits.
I wandered down the second hall watching people that were suppose to go that way, some were happy, some looked troubled. Some were saying thank you. But there was none of the fear. Looking through the doorway, it looked like you were walking into another area of a building. Nothing exceptional. I thought, at least you folks aren't going through that other door. It felt cold and ugly. This one, felt, 'normal', for lack of another word.
I walked down the third hall, and the feeling of total happiness and peace was unexplainable. And the people seemingly floated down the hall and to the door, me, I was still dragging my IV pole, and trying to get closer so I could see what was on the other side.
What I saw was the most beautiful garden. And I caught glimpses of pets and people, happy reunions. I was totally amazed and stood there staring. I swear I saw the puppy I had as a 5 year old. And Trouble. No not the mink, my very first personal ferret. I named him Trouble, but he was no trouble. I heard in my head, "MOM!!!! You're not suppose to be here, but I love you." There were all types of animals. And I heard lots of voices, "Tell my mom I love her and I miss her, I am Bandit." "Tell Dad Missy loves him." "Tell my family Munch is happy and healthy." Some of the names I remember are Kodo, Mischief, Lucky, Happy, Weezie, Red Eyes, Itty Bitty, Cookie, Eddie, Tank, Charlie, Pork Chop, Oreo, and there were lots more names lots of messages, but it was clear what they wanted. They wanted their families to know that they are happy, they miss them and they are waiting for them. And they are all healthy, and everyone gets along, and they think it is funny how they convinced humans that they didn't.
I tried to walk through the door but couldn't. And I started to cry. Then I saw my Stormy Weather, she was kissing and comforting a big boy named Bubba. She said he just got there today. She told me, "Mom, you don't belong here. But I am glad we got to see you and let you know we are happy. Let everyone know how all of us are doing." Then I heard her say, "Mom, you have to go, I love you. Come on Bubba, this place is great, and your family will come here to get you, until then, we all get to play."
I felt so depressed, I turned around and walked back to where I was sitting. And there was that lady, still sitting. Shoulder length hair with bangs that touched her eyebrows. Light brown, dark eyes, pale. She looked at me, "You don't belong here." I looked at her and told her, "I know I don't belong here, but I don't even know where here is."
She told me her name, it is Meloney. And this was her explanation of where I was.
"You are seeing this place in a way that your mind can understand. Everyone sees it differently. It is the wating place. The place where people who are in surgery, in comas, unconscious all go to wait to find out where they are suppose to go."
I asked why I was here now, she told me this. "You were here before. When you nearly died from bleeding. You knew the way, and came back even though you don't belong here. You came back for a reason. Perhaps to reassure yourself that you will see all the animals again. You talk to yourself about them."
Then I asked a stupid question, "What is everyone waiting for?" She says, "You know. Each symbol represents, Heaven, Hell, or back to life on earth. This is all how you see the crossroads and the waiting room. It is the only way your mind will accept it. Heaven, Hell, Earth, those are all terms you understand. The monitors give us the information we need to go where we belong. The monitors make sense to you, information in black and white, you go here or there. Remember, this place is like this for you because that is how you can understand it."
She got up and looked at a monitor, she smiled and told me, "I have to go now. I am getting a second chance. I was in a coma and I am waking up. I will see you again in the near future." She walked down the hall to the second door.
I was totally amazed, and sat back down dumbfounded. But as I sat there, I saw the light levels changing, and the walls shifting. And the people changing. Next thing I know I am sitting in the main lobby at the Cleveland Clinic watching people.
I get up and go back up to my room, go to my bed, see myself sleeping there, and thought, "Boy, this has been one really weird dream." Got into bed, and went to sleep.
Well, hubby dropped me off and went to park, and I went to check in for my MRI. After that, I walked into the waiting area, and heard "JEAN!!!", I looked over, "MELONEY!! OMG!!" We started talking like we have been friends for years. A tech came in to get her for her MRI, and asked "Do you know each other? It is funny how you both ended up here on the same day." Meloney replies, "We met months ago, at the crossroads." He just shrugged his shoulders and walked away with her following him.
Hug your fur angels.
Original graphic is by Thomas Kinkaid
Original graphic is by Thomas Kinkaid